How to Eat Your Vegetables

Uggghhhh
Vegetables. If it's green, I probably won't put it in my mouth.

But I'm guessing that if one were to just never eat vegetables ever, especially a vegetarian like moi, they would end up with scurvy or die or something. So we all have to eat our vegetables. Even if it pains us.
But what if...
You could eat vegetables and not vomit or pass out or  burn your tongue off?

I have the answer!!! The answer to all your problems is...
Zucchini Ricotta Fritters

This is a recipe that I picked up from Five and Spice (a very healthy food blog) and modified to work for people like me who live the fast life and don't have time for draining things for an entire hour.

So here it is:
Fast Life Zucchini Ricotta Fritters
2 zucchini
4 scallions
2 eggs
3/4 cup flour
1 tsp each salt and pepper
1/2 cup ricotta
Pinch of baking powder
2 garlic cloves
However much vegetable oil you need


The first thing you have to do is shred the zucchini using a grater. I don't expect your zucchini to be as big as mine. I lucked out and found monstrous zucchini.

AND THEN, here's where it gets fun, you've got to press all the water out of the zucchini by piling it into a tea towel and making a parcel that you will squeeze over your sink. Very aggressively. This takes a while, and your hands will reek of zucchini juice afterward. They may also hurt a bit. This should not take more than 5 minutes of angry squeezing. Also a very excellent outlet for all the rage you've accumulated over the day.

Put this into a medium bowl- or whatever works for you- and proceed.
Now it's time to thinly slice your scallions and then run through them with the knife a couple times to give them a nice dice.

Put 'em in the bowl and mince your garlic. Or use a Pampered Chef garlic press like me. Add this to the bowl too. Obviously. Actually, from now on, you should understand that everything is added to the bowl.

 Now add in the ricotta, salt, pepper, and eggs.

Mix it up and make it happy. Then add in the flour and baking powder and stir it up just like Bob Marley. Your finished batter will look like this:

 Now heat up your oil on medium heat. I used perhaps 1/4-1/2 inches of vegetable oil. It's up to you how much you add, but this worked best for me.
Add the batter a spoonful at a time, making sure to flatten the fritters to about the thickness of a couple quarters stacked on top of each other. Fry these for a few minutes on each side. I prefer to brown them as much as I can without burning them to ensure that they are 100% cooked all the way through. It's easy with this recipe to get fritters with a crispy outside and a mushy inside. Not. Fun. And possibly not safe to eat?

Once these are all nice and fried up, put them on a plate covered by a paper towel so that they can lose some of their oil.
AND VOILA, fast life zucchini ricotta fritters. The original recipe has some nice ideas for garnishes, but I don't personally like to eat these with anything else except maybe some good hot sauce. But only sometimes.
Enjoy <3
If you want to re-heat these, I recommend sticking them in the oven for a few minutes. Microwaves are not nearly as fun. Plus they make you feel less accomplished.